Alone for life?
“I’ll be 40 in May and I’m sure I’ll never find anyone.” Thus begins the most recent comment posted on what is, to date, the site’s most commented on post, I’ll be 40 soon and never been in a relationship.
And there’s more where that came from. Statements like “I turned 40 this year. It was a major bummer because…I’m still alone for another birthday” and “I am a 48 yr old female, to this day never been on a real date,” remind me that for some women, 40 is not the joyous, liberating experience it is for others.
I never quite know how to respond to these comments. I’m certainly no psychologist or relationship expert and I don’t claim to be. My first instinct is to send a virtual hug to somehow let these women know they are not alone. I want to tell them to talk to somebody – a trusted friend, a family member and certainly a professional who can help them discover the ultimate source of their feelings.
But I don’t have to be a relationship expert to relate. As someone who has spent birthdays alone, who has yet to find “Mr. Right” and often questions his very existence, I understand the sadness and hopelessness behind their words. That said, and keeping in mind I’m no card carrying member of “The Power of Intention” group, I truly believe this with all my heart — if you believe you’re destined never to find love in your life then you are absolutely right. Am I saying that opening your eyes and mind to the mere possibility of love in your life means that a man – a great man – will come into your life by next Tuesday? Nope. But keeping your eyes and mind closed will almost guarantee that he won’t.
I believe in romantic love. I believe in its strength and power. I believe that if and when you find it, it can be one of the most rewarding experiences in your lifetime. And I also believe that we have the capacity to thrive and grow in a love that isn’t only defined by who we are or are not dating/married to. If we are open to it, our lives can be big enough to receive and give love in all the shapes and forms in which we’re blessed to receive it.
So how would you respond to “Alone for life”? Are you a woman at 40 who feels destined to be alone? Share your thoughts in the comment section or on our Facebook Fan Page.