We asked about passion, and you said -  Passion is still alive…even if it doesn’t pop up every day. And you haven’t given up on finding and keeping passion alive in your relationships, it just takes a little more work at 40. There are careers, kids and bills to think about, and sometimes passion takes a back seat. Single women at 40 said chemistry and passion are still really important when dating and starting relationships, but unlike in our 20’s, it’s not the only important factor.

We asked about back-up plans, and you said – Whether it comes to having kids or your marriage, there is no back-up plan. Unlike Jennifer Lopez’ upcoming movie, those of you who are 40 and don’t have kids, seem to be ok with it. When it comes to your marriages and relationships, the master plan seems to be to make it work, i.e., there is no contingency plan for failure. We’ll see how/if that changes as we receive more responses.

We asked about women asking men out, dating in the age of social media and how you felt about the term “cougar” and you said – You’ve tried eharmony, match.com and reconnected with past flames through Facebook. Many of you have had limited success going those routes. What still works? Good old fashion friends hooking friends up. Several of our readers commented that they met their husbands/significant others after asking them out. A lot of us are still working up the nerve to ask men out, so maybe we’ll make that a challenge the next time we talk about tackling our fears. As for “cougar” talk – some of you could take it or leave it, others embraced it, but most women who responded don’t like the term one bit. Next week we’ll be featuring an interview with a woman who’s got a few things to say about being identified solely by the age of the man in her life.

Who said anything about a wedding? – So what happens when you meet Mr. Right and find yourself getting married –again- at 40? Rachel, a guest blogger and frequent contributor, wrote honestly and humorously about the topic last week, and her post resounded with many of you. In keeping with this week’s relationship theme, we thought we’d share it again.

Next week our Relationship 2.0 series continues with more of your thoughts about dating, men and managing relationship minefields at 40. We’d love to hear your thoughts – share them in the comment section, on our Facebook fan page or on Twitter @womenatforty.

Dictionary.com has several definitions for the word passion including:

• any powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, as love or hate.
• strong amorous feeling or desire; love; ardor.
• strong sexual desire; lust.
• an instance or experience of strong love or sexual desire.

So today’s question – well one of them anyway – is, as we get older, do we trade the kind of passion defined above for something else, and if so, what’s the trade-off?

In our 20’s and even 30’s, relationships can be especially emotionally charged with lots of drama and passion. There’s fighting, making up, the sense of needing or wanting to be with someone so strongly that being apart from that person can at times seem physically painful. But as we get older, do we still allow ourselves to feel that intensely about another person or relationship? As we become more mature, more practical, more grounded, do we throw passion out the window for something else?

Is there a way to keep passion as strong as the day you first met your partner and would more relationships stand the test of time if there was? Simply put, in our 40s, whether we’re meeting someone for the first time or we’re in a long term relationship, is passion as important as it used to be?

Share your thoughts on passion in relationships in our comment section, on our Facebook fan page, or email us at contribute@womenatforty.com.

For me the answer to the latter is a resounding yes! At thirty, I was just getting out of that phase of being all about trying (unsuccessfully) to see and be seen.  In the middle of all that, I found time to hope for a good job, a nice boyfriend and a comfy home.  Can you be passionate about being comfortable? Passionately comfortable? Well I was.

Almost ten years later, my ideas about passion have completely changed. I’m now as passionate about entrepreneurship as I once was about looking for the perfect job.  Now, instead of being passionate about a place, I’m passionate about getting to a place where I’m at perfect peace, regardless of what’s going on around me.  And I’m passionate about defining the things and people that are important to me and finding ways of nurturing them. What’s your passion?