You’ve come a long way baby: 20 things I’d tell you now

baby grace cropped 20 things you need to know – Hey you, standing over there looking tough and cute the way little girls often do, it’s me, well you – in about 36 years. Some things haven’t changed much. With the exception of the ribbon, your hair looked a lot like that this morning, and that stance, you still got that. You often have that same ‘four parts curiosity, one part ‘what the hell are you looking at”  look on your face even at this age – And the legs…well, like I said, some things haven’t changed much.

I wish I could protect you from, and prepare you for all that lies ahead, but I can’t. No one can really. But what I can do is share some things that only I’ll be able to. Some people think the past, present and future are all happening at once, so who knows. I know you won’t understand everything I’m saying, but take notes, you’ll need them.

  1. Some of the people in your life will disappoint you, lie to you, hurt you. Some of them are just stupid. Others are just evil. Forgive them all, stupid and evil alike, and move on. Remember what they did and learn from it. Don’t hold what they’ve done to you against anyone else.
  2. That thing you want to do with your hair in the eighties. Don’t. You leave dozens of grease spots up and down the east coast because of it, and Chris Rock will mock it mercilessly in a documentary he releases in 2009.
  3. Try to get that eating thing under control early – believe me, you’ll be fighting that battle for years. In the meantime, live your life and do the things you want to do, regardless of what the scale says.
  4. You’re going to have several really great ideas for businesses. Instead of talking yourself out of it, just do it. You are smarter, stronger and more resilient than you know.
  5. You know how they said it would be too difficult to be a successful, black, female journalist? Oprah’s like the richest person on the planet now. Seriously. Don’t listen to them. Continue reading You’ve come a long way baby: 20 things I’d tell you now

The life you planned vs. the life you have

Japanese girl in winter (drink version) Yesterday a friend shared a quote on her Facebook wall that resonated with me. I borrowed it (thanks Tanya) and immediately posted it on my wall…

You must be willing to get rid of the life you’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for you.

—Joseph Campbell

I started thinking about the life I’d planned and the life I have now. Many of the things I thought I’d be, would have done, and gotten to see, didn’t happen. But because they didn’t, I’ve been blessed to experience the things that did.  Travelling, new friendships, and a career I never thought I’d have, have all come as a result of my own best laid plans falling flat on their face.

Today, Women at Forty invites you to share your stories of “The life you planned vs. the life you have.” Have you been able to get out of your way long enough to live the life that’s been waiting for you, or are you still struggling with your best laid plains? We’ll share your answers in today’s posts.    

Click here to see what others have already submitted…