Beautiful imperfections, a little help from botox, and cougar conversations…

j0443862 Last week, women at 40 chimed in on beauty, embracing their imperfections, cosmetic surgery and cougars. Margaret wrote about rocking her little black dress with perfect posture, despite having a scar that runs from the back of her neck to the back of her waist. Lucinda admitted that while she doesn’t quite lover her imperfections, she’s gotten to an age where she just doesn’t care that much about them anymore. And Bea pointed out that some things that are considered “imperfections” in our culture are signs of beauty in others.

When it comes to going under the knife, according to our latest poll, 40% of you say that you’ll never do it. But most of you fell somewhere in between wanting a little lipo and a tummy tuck, to asking us to check in with you in a few more years. Some women even said that they’d already had work done. Fillers, botox and minor “body work” seemed to be ok for many. But most drew the line at face lifts or the types of extreme surgical procedures we’ve seen in the media of late.

After we posted our interview with Jo, from Beyond Cougar, we received several comments about the whole cougar craze. While one reader felt that in her quest not to be stereotyped by her choice of mate, Jo was in fact stereotyping older men. Others wrote in to say that the term cougar incorrectly assumes that older female/male relationships are based solely on sex and money. We’ll be covering more on the subject in a future post when we talk to a woman who suggests that sex – at least for her – is exactly what these relationships are based on.

Finally, when ABC and Fox refused to air the now infamous Lane Bryant ad, it sparked a wave of controversy and a media backlash. Were ABC and Fox objecting to the nature of the ad or the size of its subject? After all, Victoria’s Secret ads run all the time on the major networks. One reader, playing devil’s advocate, suggested that the objections to the ad might actually be based on the fact that the woman featured was actually going to meet someone for lunch in her underwear. While we’d like to give the networks the benefit of the doubt, when one of the objections comes from the same network that airs Desperate (half naked) Housewives and Dancing With The Stars featuring scantily clad “celebrities” we tend to think otherwise.

Bottom line – definitions of beauty evolve as we mature, unless of course you’re ABC or CBS. But for the rest of us, as we get older what we find beautiful, thankfully expands to include scars, wrinkles and signs that we’ve been there, done that and lived a little while we were doing it. After all, “Pretty is something you’re born with. But beautiful, that’s an equal opportunity adjective.”

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